Three Strikes

From our favorite guest blogger, pictured above:

I thought I would stop by the house today, essentially to get some trash out.  Getting up to 12 bags of trash out of the house every Tuesday has become essential in not letting it build up and getting as much junk--some of which you've seen pictured in this blog--out as possible.  I couldn't stay long, as the 76ers were on tap for a pivotal game five with Detroit, but I figured I would make the most of the toll and gas money by stopping at Lowe's on the way and doing some minor odd jobs that have been lingering.

1)  Objective: Replace high intensity light bulb in entryway.  With the help of a Lowe's associate, I found the right teeny, five dollar halogen bulb to replace the one that blew out the other day.  When I got home, I realized that the light socked is not designed to support the wattage of the bulb that was in there, indicating another dangerous shortcut by the previous homeowner.  Result: Failure.

2)  Objective:  Put a doorstop in Nicole's office door.  Except I could not get the dang hingepin out, even after taking the hinge out and banging it with a screwdriver.  Result: Failure.

3)  Objective:  Put a faceplate on only remaining open light switch in the house.  It was far more challenging than you might thing to find the right configuration for the switchplate cover I needed, which was CGI outlet, switch, switch.  After buying the wrong one twice, having my dad try to saw one to fit, and the aforementioned Lowe's associate telling me you can build your own configuration only to tell me they didn't have the right pieces I need, I thought I struck gold when Home Depot had the right one.  Only it didn't quite line up.  So I figured, if I can just loosen the one switch and push it over a centimeter or so, that baby will fit.  I just need to be careful to not this screwdriver to the metal in the BOOM SPARKS EXPLETIVE!  With the circuit breaker tripped, the screwdriver charred, and myself thoroughly shaken up, I decided to put the trash out and call it a night.

It wouldn't have been so bad if the Sixers didn't get thrashed.